Sometimes, life happens, and its going to hurt.

Yeah. Back again.

I'm hurting.

Because, well, the girl I'm with, lets go with calling her M. The girl I'm with, M, I've talked about her in my past posts. I don't know how to deal with her still. She make me the happiest person on earth sometimes.

..And then, I just, she...I, well, right now, I feel like dieing. And I'd gladly accept it. Its 4 in the morning here, haven't gotten to sleep yet, need to finish some assignments, and I've been drinking.

I...

I love you.


But then again. You make me want to die sometimes, so...

I know that we talked about our relationship.

I KNOW we did. I stayed up for 40 hours thinking about it.

You made it clear that we weren't together. You made it obvious, actually.

And you know what you insist on doing. YOU BREAK MY HEART. YOU PLAY THESE GAMES WITH ME, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH IT.

I'm not ashamed to say it, because its true, but I'm a virgin. Before her, I never really took interest in women. That's a lie. I've been interested, but not to the level I am with her. And I don't think I'm attracted to guys. (never been attracted to any guys yet, but it may happen in the future).

So yeah. I know its life. And it hurts. and I need to get over it, but I don't know how. And the main person I can talk to about these things...well, lets just say because I can't keep my mouth shut, We aren't on speaking terms.

How do normal people deal with this?