What do you want me to do...

It breaks my heart, what you do to me. You tell me how you love a man who threatened you, who still wants to kill you, just because he "loves" you. You tell me how he was our first for everything. That isn't love. its messed up.

You say I'm one of your best friends, so I beg you to listen to me. I want you to be happy. I really do. You don't know what I gave so that you would be happy. He would have gotten you anything you wanted? I wouldn't promise that, because, it would be an empty one.

He would always be there for you? Is that why he hurt you? Is that why he threatens you? Your family? Your friends?

I trust you. I believe you. When other people call you a slut, a whore, a crack head, I call them liars. Even my own family. You can hold a knife covered in blood, standing over a dead body, and say "I didn't do it," and I would side with you. If you asked me to, I would take the knife and say I did it.

I put aside my feelings for you. I do it, because, I know that if I ever act on those feelings, it would only cause you unhappiness, and I don't want that. I know I'll cause it.

So.

I've been thinking about her for the longest time.